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Captain's ActventureI say I've got a story

act iv story potentially awful

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#1 Captain

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Posted 12 September 2015 - 09:18 PM

Edit: Link to the story so far! https://docs.google....dit?usp=sharing


So I've been slacking like hell on my writing. AND with seeing twotimesthedime's fantastic screenplay, and the wonderful release that was Act IV, I've decided to pick my ass up out of bed and start a new project. So if anybody's interested, I will be undertaking what I'm expecting to be a very fun task in using Act IV as a sort of inspirational medium to create a story. In clearer words, I'm going to try and write a story based entirely off of Act IV, and also try and make it not suck.

A few words of warning: this story isn't going to follow the consensus opinion of what's going on in Act IV, and in some areas isn't even going to follow what I personally think actually happens. There will be alterations that I think are interesting based off of mishearings I had of lyrics, or possible split meanings of certain phrases and such. So if you were planning on using any of this as reference for the real story, don't. I'm not sure why you would, but you should go here and listen to Dormin and everyone else that seems to have a much better grasp of what's going on than I do. Additionally, while I won't be directly referencing twotimesthedime's script or Dormin's story analysis when I write, I've read both - so it's possible that some of that will bleed into my work unconsciously. If that happens it probably won't be noticeable to me even if you point it out, so basically just keep in mind that those two threads exist.

One last thing - I've just started college (actually I've been here for like a month holy crap) and while I have quite a bit of free time now, it's possible that that time is gonna shrink or disappear entirely in the future. So there might be some time between updates, and it certainly won't be as organized as what TTTD did. I'll do my best, though! (I will probably write in a separate document and then paste it into the one I'll be linking here, so people don't have copies that end mid-sentence).


Anyways, I'd best get to writing. There is one thing I'd love suggestions on, though! If I share this story with ANYONE that isn't already familiar with TDH, consistently calling the main character The Boy would probably become confusing quickly. So I'm wondering what you people think The Son's name should be, since that's what The Boy's gonna go by for pretty much all of the story. Thanks in advance!

Edited by Captain, 26 September 2015 - 11:22 PM.

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#2 twotimesthedime

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Posted 12 September 2015 - 11:21 PM

This is gonna be awesome, I can tell. Funnily enough, once I get over and done with the huge amount of BUSY in my life (Wednesday, hallelujah), I , too, will begin "tearing apart" my current script to mold it into what I'm planning for an Act III/IV adaptation! Of course there's so many interps to choose from, so that'll be fun sorting them all out. I'm one to try my best to get it down to exact detail, and since the Wayfarer came out (as well as returning to some lyrics) I've rewritten almost twenty pages. Kinda crazy. But I do love that you're planning on doing a looser adaptation of sorts, it'll be interesting to see what you come up with!

As for names, I looked up the most popular ones in and around the 1890s/early 1900s, when The Boy and possibly The Son would've been born. Some that stuck out to me were Samuel, Joseph, John, and Harry. It's hard to find a name that fits since I can't even imagine an alternate to The ___ for anyone. Makes me wonder if Casey has secret names for all of the characters? It IS a good idea to name them, though. I had the hardest time in my screenwriting class because people didn't get the idea of nameless characters haha. Anyway, this sounds super cool and I can't wait to read your work!
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#3 Guest_jbherenow_*

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Posted 17 September 2015 - 02:38 AM

The Boy's name, to me personally, is : Hunter

#4 Silver

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Posted 17 September 2015 - 01:37 PM

 jbherenow, on 17 September 2015 - 02:38 AM, said:

The Boy's name, to me personally, is : Hunter

Definitely.

In fact, I think he's sometimes referred to as Hunter in concept art, possibly even in the new Wayfarer book.

#5 DerekAdams32

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Posted 17 September 2015 - 03:59 PM

The Boy's name should be Harvey IMO
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#6 Captain

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Posted 26 September 2015 - 11:21 PM

Thanks for the confidence/help guys! I'm happy to report that I have just finished Chapter One: Rebirth. I'd love it if you could read it and let me know what you think - I'm far from perfect, so if there's something you think I could do better I'd love to hear it! A side note right up here where people will see it - The tree image is not mine, and I will have to replace it - I took it from google images to work as what I thought was a fitting placeholder until I can find something suitable. Interestingly enough, I couldn't find where the image actually came from, just a bunch of people using it, so I couldn't source it even if I tried.


 twotimesthedime, on 12 September 2015 - 11:21 PM, said:

But I do love that you're planning on doing a looser adaptation of sorts, it'll be interesting to see what you come up with!

Thanks! I'm doing it like this for two reasons, basically. The first is that I just think it's interesting, and allows me to put a little more creativity into the project. The second is that I think it makes it a little more exciting - if I just followed the story thread's outline, everybody would know what's coming next! This way it's a little less predictable.

 DerekAdams32, on 17 September 2015 - 03:59 PM, said:

The Boy's name should be Harvey IMO

I agree with the couple of people who said Hunter for the Boy's name - that was the easier one, I think. However, I decided to name the Son 'Samuel Dufour'. I do kinda like the name Harvey, so I could switch it if you guys think it fits better. Honestly, who would've thought names would be the hardest part? :rolleyes:
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#7 twotimesthedime

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Posted 27 September 2015 - 01:17 AM

Just read through your first chapter, and I've gotta say, you have some serious skill in the writing department (this coming from a Writing major). I was engaged the whole time, and I really enjoy your voice and writing style! I don't think I have any really big critiques so far because everything about it was excellent. If anything, I'd suggest maybe spending more time on a couple of moments and flesh them out a bit more. There was also a time or two when I was a little confused on who was speaking at first, most notably in the Oracle scene at the end, so maybe clearing that up with a dialogue tag or two thrown in there would help it read better!

Speaking of which, the Oracles being represented as figures from his past/the flood water on the Delphi was probably my favorite part. It was fresh and interesting, and made for some awesome imagery that was almost poetic. And I will admit it, some of the parts about his past made me a little teary eyed, so good job on that as well. I also smiled a little at some of the moments - you did say in the first post that some things from this site would bleed into your writings subconsciously, and I did see a little of that happen (the rose petals from Ms. Leading, the Oracles' white eyes, etc) but I totally enjoyed it, it was like a mini shoutout or something. Anyway, super good job, and I'm excited to read more of this! Keep us posted.
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#8 Lyricon

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Posted 09 October 2015 - 03:56 PM

This story is fresh af. Keep at it.

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Do Barney The Dinosaur appears on Act V?






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